Kay:

Hey, hey, Questers it’s Tuesday, October 12th and this is episode 462. We hope you’re having a wonderful day so far and that this podcast encounters you in just the best of spirits. We have a quote for you today from one of our very favorite authors Miss Mel Robbins.

Shi:

She tells us, “You need to hear this loud and clear: No one is coming. It is up to you.”

Kay:

Okay. I kind of feel like Mel is the character in some movie from the future coming back and being like, no one’s coming to help you, man! You’ve got to know!

Shi:

Well, she kind of is because she’s lived her life from a place of waiting for a savior. She’s really walked this road of traditional corporate career, of family life, of all of these things, and then realized that she just wasn’t moving in the direction she wanted. But making a change like that is massive and scary. She didn’t just make the change. That was 20 years ago. She’s now an author, radio host, an incredible influencer and thought leader, and expert and she’s just one of the people that we love. You can actually hear her say this quote in her TEDx talk, which was one of the very, very first TED talks to go viral. So, if you’re interested, go watch Mel Robbins TED talk, you will not be disappointed. It is hilarious. It lets you get to know that harried character from the future, and you’ll fall in love with her just like we have.

Kay:

If you don’t know Mel’s story, you might not know that she actually didn’t really make her change in life until she was about 40 years old. It took her a really long time to right her own ship and realize I’m drowning myself in alcohol and I’m not being constructive with my family and I’m not moving in the direction that I want and then turned her life around and has since…

Shi:

And a lawyer and I’m miserable

Kay:

And a lawyer and I’m miserable and hit the traditional trappings of success if you will. But what I love about this is that she was in that space. She thought the clout, the success, the business, the family, the car would save her, but she realized she really had to just dig within in order to find that hero.

Shi:

I love that her own story demonstrates that and then she wants to become this advocate to help others realize this sooner. She’s got that kind of energy that is just that tough love mom. But she uses quite a few examples where she just talks about, in fact, the role of your parents in your life. As a kid, you can almost rely on the fact that your parents are going to help you steer in the right direction. They’re going to tell you what snacks to eat. They’re going to tell you when you have to go exercise. They’re going to tell you when your homework’s due. They’re going to bug you about your laundry. They’re going to make you go to bed on time. But as you become an adult, there isn’t someone that makes you do that and there’s no parent ever coming back into your life. So, our job ends up becoming the manager of that. But lots of us spend 20 years like Mel waiting for someone to come along and start telling you what to do.

Kay:

Well, I love that kind of separation here between that no one is coming to tell you what to do to save your life, anything of that nature, and not saying no one is here for you or you don’t have people alongside you on the journey. So, “No one is coming. It’s up to you,” does not mean you have to go it alone. It means that it is up to you to take charge of your own life, your own role in the relationships that you carry, your own role in your own achievement and success and happiness and take that part on for you while understanding that you affect others as well.

Shi:

Real talk when you’re younger and if you don’t intentionally change, and I think this ends up becoming the default for a lot of people. But I know I definitely experienced this in my young adulthood of just wanting so bad to get discovered or win the lottery, or someone comes along and sees how great you are and becomes your sponsor. What is it called when the old school artists used to have somebody who would…?

Kay:

Like a protégé?

Shi:

Yeah. Yeah. But anyway, I used to hope and dream and wish that that would happen to me even as a pipe dream. Even when you know it’s not realistic your mind still wanders in that direction. But if we let it stay there, if I let it stay there then I wouldn’t have been able to see that it is up to me and start taking those actions in that direction. But I think it’s human nature to have that desire that someone’s just going to come in and see how fantastic you are and give you everything and make it easy for you.

Kay:

I mean.

Shi:

Of course, what we know is that wouldn’t be fulfilling, and you’d end up miserable but that’s what you desire, I think early on in life.

Kay:

That does sound like a Disney princess dream. That I get swooped by a knight in shining armor. Someone comes along to save me, but like Mel Robbins tells us, “You need to hear this loud and clear: No one is coming.” I’m going to shake you like the crazy lady in the future.” It is up to you.”

Shi:

Which brings us to your quest today and today we want you to choose something that you’ve been putting off for a while and take action because just like Mel Robbins tells us, “No one is coming. It is up to you.” Even if it’s the smallest action towards this you will feel so much better and show up because it’s up to you and you alone. Are you ready? Show up with us now.

Kay & Shi:

Let’s quest!