Kay:
Hello, Questers, and welcome back. It’s Wednesday, December 22nd and this is episode 493. We have another four for you today and that’s four calling birds as we are on our 12 days to Christmas. Cannot wait for the big day. I know things are starting to heat up in our homes and in fact, today, Shila and I are getting to partake in our second annual Adopt a Family Event. We’re going to go drop off Christmas gifts at our adopted family here in town for our Christmas giving this year and are excited to get out there and make it happen. But we have a great quote for you today from the American poet, essayist, and journalist Walt Whitman.
Shi:
Walt tells us, “Re-examine all you have been told in school or church or in any book and dismiss whatever insults your own soul.” This encouragement to analyze from a place of, I keep wanting to say critical, but the connotations that our society places on a word like that make me want to gravitate towards something else. But bringing this level of scrutiny to what it is that you’ve been fed or that you’ve learned, or you’ve been taught is so healthy for the progress of you as a human being and for us as a society at large that I think many of the greats throughout history have told us to just be wary of what most accept as belief or status quo or normal.
Kay:
One of the things that I appreciated so much about the couple of college classes that I took was that it seemed as if higher education brought about a space for debate around institutionalized concepts. It felt really good to be in an environment where we could openly challenge religious ideas or psychological institution ideas or sociological institutions and things. So, having this opportunity to say, “Hey, wait a second…” and examine, marked for me the difference in higher-level academia. So, not just from a defiant or from an internal point standpoint but giving yourself the opportunity to bring the magnifying glass forward is actually a really intellectual way to approach any problem or even your old patterns that you may have learned from school, church or books.
Shi:
I am so glad you brought forward the imagery of the magnifying glass. That’s exactly what I imagine as well. But just re-examine, pull out that magnifying glass. Maybe in my non-higher education – what is that called? Your preliminary education, your elementary and K-12 educations. I remember that there were lots of things that we would learn in progression. You do your first unit on geography somewhere in elementary school and you hear about Africa and Egypt. And then, I’ve got two kids in sixth grade. So, they just wrapped up their entire Egypt unit. So, imagine the magnifying glass that they just got to pull out and reexamine something that they’ve already learned. There was more to learn there. There was more to grow. When you go back and study ancient societies, then again in high school there’s, even more you get to see and more that you get to understand.
So, dismissing what you’ve learned as being the entire body of work that there is, I think it’s another angle to look at this here. Re-examine it, pull out the magnifying glass, and then also question that piece of just what and who is motivating the information that I’m receiving right now and what could their possible motives be behind sharing it in this way. It’s important to bring again that scrutiny forward so that you can be a person who is created by their own beliefs. Then this second piece here, “…dismiss whatever insults your own soul.” Love that because Walt’s giving that permission of some things ain’t going to jive with you. You’re not going to vibe with everything, and some things really don’t vibe. When we feel those total aversions, then it’s okay to dismiss them and excuse them out of our life.
Kay:
So, let’s talk about a belief that was deeply ingrained, I know, for many millennial women, but for me in particular, Kay here, that when re-examined, I found as an adult was going to be something that could serve me better. So, growing up for us millennial women, we were not blessed with the level of Disney princesses that are currently available. We did not have sister love being shown as true love. We did not have independent females who didn’t depend on a male figure. So, this idea that boys had to fit this Prince Charming, sweep you off your feet, ride in on the white horse, solve all of your problems was actually a pretty dang destructive thing to learn as a child who then attempts to function as a fully grown woman in a relationship in society. So, as I got older and I know many millennial women feel the same way and began to re-examine what am I willing to do for a man, who am I going to show up for, for myself, and inside of a relationship? What expectations am I to put on the other person and learn that different way? Because it started to insult our souls that the idea, at least for me, that my happiness, my success, my fulfillment had to rely on a romantic relationship. So, found that pattern that was learned from book, TV, movie and dismissed it because it insulted my soul.
Shi:
Ah, what a great practical, real-world example. To remind you what Walt Whitman told us, “Re-examine, all you have been told in school or church or in any book and dismiss whatever insults your soul.”
Kay:
Alright, Questers, we have a Wellness Wednesday Quest for you today. Today, we want you to try out a new to you self-care behavior, whether that’s journaling, taking a hot bath, maybe a walk around the block, or cleaning out your closet. Be creative and find something that feels really good to you.
Kay & Shi:
Are you ready?
Shi:
Let’s quest!
