Kay:
Hey there Questers and welcome back! It’s Friday, March 5th and this is episode 305. We have a Pope John Paul II quote for you today and he says, “Forgiveness is above all a personal choice, a decision of the heart to go against the natural instinct to pay back evil with evil.”
Shi:
Now, Pope John Paul II, Pope for over 30 years, reigning Pope during what came to be uncovered as the terrible sex scandal within the Catholic church. Clearly, he was at the head and probably needs forgiveness more than many. But what he tells us here about that act of forgiveness is one that really challenges us when we examine his circumstances, because it’s not about granting him forgiveness and forgiving his sins for his sake. It’s about that personal choice of being at peace with yourself.
Kay:
In fact, in preparing for this episode, I was getting pretty heated telling Shila, “Are we sure we want to bring forward a Pope John Paul II quote?” because he reigned over the Catholic church during such a dark time that didn’t get uncovered until after his death, he allowed so much evil to happen under his reign by just turning a blind eye. But, he even says it right here in this quote, that we have to go against that heart, that natural instinct to pay back evil with evil, that eye for an eye idea. The guy’s already dead and looks at how much anger I hold in my heart toward him who is really suffering over that, Pope John Paul II or Kay Salerno?
Shi:
Well, I appreciate the respect and I’m glad that he says, it’s the natural instinct to pay back evil with evil, because I don’t know about you guys, but I get that knee jerk reaction. You wrong me, I wrong you. You call me out, I want to call you out. I want a tit for tat. I want an eye for an eye, it’s that natural knee-jerk. So, reminding us here that it’s a decision of the heart. It’s that place where you come in and you make a decision in your heart that goes against that natural grain. It can be so hard. It’s kind of that classic ism of holding a grudge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Withholding forgiveness is that same concept here. But that poison, when it comes naturally in that knee-jerk reaction, we can see how this has plagued humanity for thousands of years.
Kay:
I like that he brings that into it, being that personal choice, because that personal choice is you drinking the poison or not. It is you perpetuating betrayal or not. It’s your own personal suffering. Forgiveness, it’s all about you, baby. It’s not about the other person on the end of whatever wrong they did you and whatever it was, I’m really sorry on their behalf that they hurt you in that way or whatever it was that hurt you in that way. But forgiveness is an inside job man. It is all about you and doesn’t have much to do with the person on the other end.
Shi:
Here’s what I love. Psychologists generally define forgiveness as: a conscious deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offenses. So, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness. Bringing that back, it’s an inside job. It’s for you. It’s for-giving you peace.
Kay:
Yep. It is for-giveness and every time that you forgive someone else you’re voting, you’re casting a vote for peace in your life. The more forgiveness you give the more peace you find yourself in. It is forgiving for you, not for them. So, just a reminder, Pope John Paul II whether he deserves the forgiveness or not, we forgive you, sir. “Forgiveness is above all a personal choice, a decision of the heart to go against natural instinct, to pay back evil with evil.”
Shi:
Alright, this weekend we’re asking you to make some decisions of the heart and have a Forgiveness Fri-yay Quest. So, your quest is to break the cycle of unresourceful ways of being that the payback mindset may push you into perceiving and consider giving some forgiving instead. Are you ready?
Kay & Shi:
Let’s quest!
