Kay:

Hey, there Questers! Today’s September 10th and this is Episode 179. It is World Suicide Prevention Day, so if this isn’t a topic you’re ready to dive into, we would suggest moving on to a different episode because we’re going to face it head on and talk about some personal experiences. And so, we have a quote for you today, and it’s out of a Disney movie (Frozen II), but it is anything but silly…

Shi:

Now, Princess Anna of Arendelle is singing when she gives us this quote, but the quote for you today is, “When it’s clear that everything will never be the same again, then I’ll make the choice to hear that voice and do the next right thing.”

Kay:

Now, oftentimes, when people are in the midst of depression, it can be really difficult to hear that small voice inside that says you’re worth it, or it’s worth it, or you can, or they will miss you…but choosing to hear that voice oftentimes saves those people who are on the brink of actually doing the deed.

Shi:

In the scene from the movie here, Princess Anna has just lost Olaf, lost her sister, and realizes that she has to basically decimate her hometown in order to set things right. And, she’s just so overwhelmed with sadness, but she’s got the small voice inside and she does something pretty incredible, which is to remind herself to not get too crazy with all the details and the grief and everything, and just put one foot in front of the other and do the next right thing.

Kay:

Now, in the very beginning of this quote, Anna says, “When it’s clear that everything will never be the same again.” Now, many people who end up committing suicide have the urge to do so because of some sense of loss of identity. Maybe it is a gentleman who really had his identity wrapped up in his job and he loses his job and now he doesn’t feel worthy. Or, maybe it’s a mom who’s dealing hard with postpartum depression, and doesn’t feel like she can care for her child, thus taking away this built in identity and expectation of being a mom. And so, in the first part of this quote, Princess Anna is accepting that everything will never be the same again….She’s just getting it up front and-

Shi:

Facing it.

Kay:

Instead of allowing that to tear her off course at literally her darkest hour.

Shi:

I appreciate that you brought that part forward here because she is saying that it sucks right now.

Kay:

And nothing’s ever going to be the same again.

Shi:

And recognizing that! Sometimes you can see that tendency to Pollyanna. And, I know that I’ve been guilty of this too, saying, “Well, there’s refugees in the world who have it worse,” or, “There’s lots of people who have it worse” – either towards myself when trying to get myself to feel better, or towards others when they’re in that place too. But, starting with that recognition of your own experience – when something happens and it becomes clear that everything will never be the same again – can help us come to, “Okay, so now what?” And then, the “now what?” is to find that small voice inside, because it doesn’t go away….It might be minuscule – but it does not go away.

Kay:

And, it’s a choice to listen to it. You’ve got to make the choice to hear the voice and then do the next right thing. So, you choose to listen, and then you act based on what that listening brought forward. And, this can be super difficult for people who are in the midst of a deep depression to even wrap their brains around because the bee in the attic is screaming so many terrible things so loudly at them, that they feel like it’s never going to go away. But, that little voice, it can be heard. Maybe, if you’re someone who’s in that depressive cycle or you’re feeling these things, the voice can be heard by building the skill of listening to it. It’s not like you’re broken because you don’t hear the voice all the time in your head. You are whole. It’s just a skill that has to – (like anything) – be built through intentional effort.

Shi:

And then, we end here with, “And do the next right thing.” And, that’s really just recognizing: What IS that next step on the staircase? Sometimes we look at the top of the mountain or the end of the marathon and it’s like…it’s so HUGE. It’s scary and it seems absolutely impossible. But, what’s not impossible is putting your shoes on, right? What’s not impossible is taking that step, or making the call, or doing something small. And, sometimes your focus has to shrink down to, “What’s the next thing I can do?…What CAN I do? What next step can I take? What will move me in a direction that’s more productive and positive for me overall?”

Kay:

So, in the spirit of World Suicide Prevention Day, we want to arm you with this quote from Princess Anna of Arendelle – from the movie Frozen 2 – where she says, “When it’s clear that everything will never be the same again,” (AKA: you have a major identity shift), “Then make the choice to hear that voice and do the next right thing.”

Shi:

All right. It’s a right thing – quest for you today. So, we want you to ask yourself: What is your next right thing? You might not be on the brink of suicide, but this is good advice for wherever you are in your life. So what’s your next right thing? Listen to your small voice inside, and whatever you’re doing right now, do a small, next right thing….Maybe it’s drinking a glass of water, sending a text to a friend, or answering that email. Maybe it’s taking some trash out of your car, or maybe it’s unloading the dishwasher, or maybe it’s even to put down the bagel. But, whatever it is, do your next right thing, right now! Are you ready?

Kay & Shi:

Let’s quest!