Kay:
Hey there Questers, and welcome back! It’s September 30th. And this is Episode 193. It’s International Podcast Day today, so thanks for being here on our podcast! Glad to have you guys. We have an ancient Greek philosopher quote coming at you today from Diogenes.
Shi:
He says, “We have two ears and one tongue so that we should listen more and talk less.”
Kay:
All right…Confession time. If there’s anyone who needs this advice, it’s me….(This is Kay here!), and I am definitely somebody who needs to work on my listening. I love to talk but I have to work on my listening too. And oftentimes, people think that this isn’t a skill you can build.
Shi:
Listening. I mean, there’s a difference between listening and hearing, right? And then, there’s active listening. So, there’s all kinds of layers to listening and I think that this is getting at that two ears one tongue point, which helps remind us the importance of listening and the value of listening.
Kay:
Well, we’ve all heard the example that – if two people enter a conversation and one person talks most of the time – who gained more out of the conversation? The person who listened, because you have the opportunity to learn from others. And sometimes it takes a little bit of humility not to want to share your story or whatever’s going on in your world in favor of another person, or to sit and listen. Or, as I’ve been told before, to have to “sit on your hands” and listen. It can really end up being a benefit to your life!
Shi:
It can, and it is a skill that you can build and you build it through actively and intentionally making the time to participate in listening and doing it on a deeper and deeper level as you encounter situations and conversations that can invite you to do so. Because, it’s easy to listen to the things you like, but it is a lot harder to listen to subjects that you find boring, subjects that you don’t have context for, or maybe some stories that don’t capture your attention. And maybe you even have something competing for your attention. So, there’s a lot that can make listening at large difficult, which is all the more reason why it’s a skill we have to work to build!
Kay:
You know, actually, I just had an instance last night where my husband was talking to me and my daughter. And, my two-year-old comes up to hand me something and she says, “Mommy, mommy!” And, my attention instantly goes from my husband to my daughter and he’s like, “I was literally in the middle of telling you something and you turn your attention to our daughter.” And so, it’s one of those things where, oftentimes, there’s so much going on that competes for your attention at any given time, that it really does take practice and intentionality to ensure that you are acting with those listening ears.
Shi:
You know, you’ve been listening to audio books quite a bit. That’s been bringing a lot of voices in that you can’t talk back to, which I know has helped you in terms of learning, and growing, and building the skills needed to head in the direction that you’re looking to head. And I think that’s a great strategy for all of us to think about to. So, we not only want to intentionally listen more to the people around us, but also listen to nature, listen to books on tape, and listen to things that will help fill your mind, heart, spirit, and soul with things that make you feel alive!
Kay:
Listen to podcasts, just like this one!
Shi:
Yeah! It is International Podcast Day after all!
Kay:
Exactly. So, we couldn’t help but give a listener quote in for you guys. And you know, talking is important, don’t get us wrong. Talking is one of those things that’s important. But, oftentimes, when we listen, our talking even gets better, because when you’re listening to those outside sources, you’re gaining more vocabulary, and you’re gaining more context for the world at large. And, when you’re listening to those around you, you’re gaining feedback for how you can become a better human, and how you can grow. And so, listening really has so many applicable ways of coming into your life as a learning tool. And it’s not something that comes naturally for everybody. Some of you out there are your audio learners, and – Congratulations! – because us kinesthetics are very jealous.
Shi:
Well, you know, it’s funny to think about the fact that when we listen, especially if we’re new to listening and the skill of listening, you find more and more to talk about, right? The more you listen, the more you have to say, and the more intelligent things you have to say. And so, any of us who get into a new skill can make that effort to start listening more. You listen to a book or you hear a compelling talk and you want to go talk about it to others and share it. And that’s helpful because it helps you mastermind and learn the material, but it can also then perpetuate maybe the talking too much or not being able to listen, because you’re SO excited to share the new thing that you listened to. So, finding this balance as you grow is always an interesting one.
Kay:
Oh, well, balance is one of those things we’re all attempting to find, especially that balance between listening and talking. And, just a reminder, Diogenes, one of the original cynics of the world…which – by the way – we did not realize that cynicism was an actual philosophical argument until now!
Shi:
It’s a whole thing!
Kay:
Apparently it’s a whole thing. So, he says, “We have two ears and one tongue, so that we would listen more and talk less.”
Shi:
All right, and that brings you to your quest! Today is obviously a listen-to-a-podcast quest, because it is International Podcast Day! So we want you to explore one other podcast. We know this one’s your favorite, but go find another one, or set the intention to listen more deeply in a conversation if you can’t get another podcast into your agenda. So are you ready?
Kay & Shi:
Let’s quest!
