Kay:
Hey there, Questers, and welcome back! It’s Tuesday, September 8th, and this is Episode 177. We have an awesome quote for you today from the queen herself, Oprah Winfrey!
Shi:
Just 10 words. “You can have it all, just not all at once.” I love this quote, and of course, love Oprah! American talk show host, television producer, actress, author, philanthropist, influencer of the times, and the very first black woman to become a billionaire in the US….I mean – OPRAH!
Kay:
She is so awesome. I think she’s kind of the first person who really brought the sense of true compassion, connection, and empathy to the screen. People would come onto the Oprah show with their deepest, darkest issues and problems, and she would talk about them, and showcase them, and raise awareness and help them, or give money for them, or help raise money for their causes. And, it’s been really beautiful to see that she turned entertainment into a vehicle for philanthropy and for empowerment. And, it’s really neat to see that that model is successful in the world.
Shi:
Right?! I am proud of her. And, this quote, “You can have it all, just not all at once,” is just so good. Oprah is someone that I think many of us would look at and say, “She ‘has it all’.” She never got married. She didn’t have kids. So, maybe someone would say, “Well, she’s lacking in that way. But, pretty much any other measure that you look at Oprah, she has knocked it out of the park. So, take it from someone like Oprah, you CAN have it all. And then, the next part is what brings in that practicality, and that nuance, and that understanding of the next level…“Just not all at once.”
Kay:
Which, I think, goes to show that there is this ebb and flow of life in general. And, you’re going to have things that you want pretty much at all steps of the road. And, you’re also going to have things that you don’t want at all steps in the road. Because, if you have it all – (if we’re just going to talk about the traditional idea of “having it all”) – this idea of having it all is probably more relevant when we’re thinking about, “I have no problems. And, ‘I have it all’, because I have no problems.” But, guess what?..If you have no problems, you’re probably dead!
Shi:
You dead! Dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, DEAD! Well, that’s what Tony Robbins says anyways. Don’t wish you didn’t have problems, because everybody has problems…Every business has problems…Every person has problems…The only people who don’t have problems are the ones in the graveyard…and we don’t want to go there yet! So, having problems is a part of life, but it can be tough when problems that are specific and individual to you come up. And, she says, “You can have it all,” and all encompasses ALL. So, it depends on where we point ourselves, and where we direct ourselves, and in what direction we move in. Because, you could have all the bad stuff too! You may make choices that take you down that path, and you can have it all taken away, or you could have it all lost, but you wouldn’t lose it all at once…It would be every step along the way. Just like anything in our human experience, there’s two sides of that sword, and two sides of the coin. And, it all depends on where we focus our energy and where we flow through it. And so, understanding that it’s going to be, (as John Maxwell says), the law of the process, and that anything is possible and achievable, but all of those possibilities and achievements come at a price. And, some of the times that price is a certain amount of time…Sometimes it’s a certain amount of money…Sometimes it’s a certain amount of education or experience – which means that walking towards something and trying to achieve something is inevitably going to extract a toll from you.
Kay:
Well, and as you’re working to achieve that thing, oftentimes it can feel like you’re not a success on the way, because the success picture probably looks like, “Having It all.” And so, you might get to a place where, you’ve got the finances in play, you’ve got a great marriage and these great kids, and it’s all good. And, your money’s down, and you’re feeling like it’s right, but you’re not really making a difference in the world. And so, you go out to start making a difference in the world, and you find a passion, and you start volunteering, and the passion starts taking up more of your time. And, before you know it, those finances start to slip, your kids need more time from you. And so, as you’re giving out to this other passion, those other things still need your attention…Well, maybe not “need,” but your attention wanes from those other things, as it waxes towards something else. And so, when you find new things to add into the picture, other things have to give and take, which means that that “all-at-once” picture isn’t necessarily feasible for you…You have to give from something else to give to another. Because, we all have the same 24 hours in the day. So, maybe you say, “My TV time is incredibly important to me, but I just don’t have time to work out.” Now, that might be you saying, “You can have it all, just not all at once.” If you only have the same 24 hours in the day, and you’re not willing to give up the TV time in order to have the exercise time, you might need to figure something out.
Shi:
Right! Like, if you’re trying to be a neurophysicist and learn how to speak fluent Spanish, and learn how to run a full marathon, and raise five children, and save the world from poverty all at the same time, it’s going to be really hard to focus on any one of those and actually see them advance towards the, “Have it all.” So, just reminding you of what Oprah Winfrey said here, “You can have it all, just not all at once.”
Kay:
So, today’s quest is a vision quest! Take a vision, a dream, or a goal that you have, and write it down on a piece of paper into steps. Determine what daily actions it will take in order for you to develop that vision, and then break it into stages. Remember – you can have it all, but it’s not going to come at once…It comes step by step. Are you ready?
Kay & Shi:
Let’s quest!